Staying home and going out

The weekend is quickly drawing to a close. The funny part is that I'm writing this at 11:42 am Saturday morning Ontario time!

Last weekend felt like it started on Friday morning, since Thursday we were helping with the rummage sale setup. Once we got home around 10 that evening, we didn't leave the apartment again except on Saturday night to do some grocery shopping. It seemed like everyone we tried to make plans with (ok, the 2 people we tried to make plans with) were already busy, so we just stayed home and relaxed. Sometimes you need plans that involve others in order to muster up the motivation to go out. I don't remember what we did, but it probably involved Elebits and Skype calls to Canada. I know that I wasn't too upset about our lack of outings - that was my "homebody" side kicking in!

This weekend was just the opposite. Thursday morning Darren and I made plans to go see a movie that evening. He had been wanting to see the new Coen brothers movie and we've heard that the length of time a movie plays in Doha is pretty unpredictable. So we thought we'd jump at the chance to see the flick at the nearby theatre. But then Darren got a call from our friend Michael who invited him (and then later me) to join him on a trip to a Qatari family farm. This invite came minutes before another friend called and asked if we wanted to join them (and a bunch of others, I'm assuming) at the Doha Rugby Club's Oktoberfest celebrations. Who would have thought we'd have 3 things to do in one night!

We ended up going to the farm, and did not regret the decision for one moment. This past Thursday night was one of my favourite experiences in Qatar to date. You can read all about it over at Darren's blog.

Friday Darren could have gone to the wedding of a relative of a man we met at the farm. That sentence IS as confusing as it reads! But we had already planned on attending a Dhow trip with some colleagues and other local expats (they knew each other; it wasn't just a random group of people). A Dhow is a traditional Arabic boat that was originally used for sailing or fishing. It's now used for tourism. It was so nice to be out on the sea, feeling the breeze and even swimming a little! Fresh air is somthing we don't get a lot of in Doha since we're often indoors, so I've got to enjoy it whenever I can find it!

Today we rested. I didn't even get out of bed until after 10 am! A little cleaning, a little cooking, a little game playing, a little reading and the day has gone. Darren is currently out getting a hair cut and doing the necessary grocery shopping while I type this. This evening we'll have some dinner, listen to a podcast from the Meeting House and iron some clothes for the morning. That will have been our weekend!

It feels so good to be invited somewhere. However, it doesn't feel better to be invited to two places at the same time! At least that's how it is with me. Perhaps it's due to the fact that I hate making decisions almost as much as I hate disappointing people. Fortunately it doesn't happen very often!

Next weekend looks like it could be a full one, too - as long as my homebodyness doesn't kick in again! Stay tuned to find out! Hopefully it will involve a nice mix of relaxation, excitement and new experiences!

Convenience vs. well, everything else!

My cubicle neighbour and his wife rented a car for the week in order to explore the city a little more independently. His comment was, "Once you get behind the wheel again, you realize how much you need it!"

But we don't want to need a car.

Yes, it would be very convenient to be able to go places on our own schedules, but it's not a need. Having a car would save us the trouble of asking for a ride, but it's not a need.

I must admit, there are times when it sounds tempting to return to the independent days of car ownership. But then I recite to myself the reasons we've decided to remain a carless family:

1. Traffic: The traffic here is much different that it is at home. There are rules of the road, but they're not the same rules we're used to. I'm sure I could learn these new rules, but it requires more aggressive driving - something I'm not good at and the very reason I try to avoid driving even in Toronto!
   
   
2. Environment: Although it often doesn't seem like it, each person can make a difference. One less car on the road means slightly fewer harmful emissions being distributed into the atmosphere. This is especially true around here where the majority of the vehicles on the road are SUVs.
   
   
3. Expense: Part of our reason for coming here is to save money. A car is an additional expense that we simply don't need at this time.
   
   
4. Hassle: Owning a car means taking care of it. And in this dusty environment, that means more filter changes and car washes than at home. Also, there are lots of accidents every day, and vehicles in accidents need to be fixed or replaced. And let's not forget the initial hassle of purchasing the car, getting the financing (which means getting a loan from a local bank), registering the vehicle...and each of these things requires a letter from my employer and what seems like a stack of paperwork.
   

Since not having a vehicle (for the first time in almost 10 years) I have also noticed unexpected benefits:

1. Humility: It is humbling to always be asking for rides, especially when we're so used to the independence associated with our own vehicles.
   
   
2. Relationships: Wherever we go, we drive with someone. On the bus to work, I talk with my colleagues. When driving with friends, we have nice conversations. Even taxi rides become a chance to meet someone new.
   
   
3. Reduced stress: Driving to work has never been so easy. All I have to do is make sure I'm on the bus at 20 past the hour and that's it. I can read, I can doze, I can chat with people - even in the middle of a traffic jam, I feel no stress!
   
   
4. Exercise: Going grocery shopping, depositing a cheque, paying a bill, mailing a letter, going out for dinner - all these activities now give us a chance to get a bit of exercise. Granted it's not much exercise, but a 10-minute walk is better than no walk at all!
   

If we ever have children, we'll move out to a villa. That's where the college houses the families. There having a car will become a need as there is nothing within walking distance and I refuse to put a child's life in danger on a bicycle on these crazy streets. So that leaves taxis, which don't come equipped with car seats. (In fact, the only car seats I've seen used in the entire city are in westerners' cars!)

But for now, we're happy to be a carless family. And hopefully if we do rent a car for a weekend or a short vacation, we won't feel the need to keep it! If I do, I'll just reread this post from James' blog - it will be just the motivation I need to maintain my resolve to live without a car.

Learning about Pearls

Darren and I joined the Qatar Natural History Group (QNHG) on Wednesday. It's an international group of people living in Qatar and who have an interest in the natural history of the area. Once a month members gather to hear a talk on an area of interest, and there are also monthly field trips to places around Qatar. Often these field trips are led by amateur botanists, archaeologists, geologists- people who have some knowledge of a particular area and are willing to share it. For example, at the end of the month there's a trip to visit the Desert roses.

The talk given at Wednesday's inaugural meeting for this season was well worth the 30QR membership fee! Hubert Bari gave a talk entitled The Water World is an Oyster. He is a pearl expert, author and exhibition curator. I believe he is currently the curator of the pearl collection at the National Islamic Museum.

This is what I learned about pearls:

• Any shell can make a pearl.
• Pearls are made of the same material as the shell, so the colour of the shell matches the colour of the pearl.
• Pearl material is made by the mantle, which is attached to the edge of the shell.
• Natural pearls are created when an intruder enters an oyster. The oyster's mantle creates shell material to envelop the intruder and protect the animal from the intrustion. These are often attached to the shell, kind of like a blister.
• Free pearls (the round ones that are not attached to the shell, and that we make pearl necklaces out of) are created when a worm larvae enters the opening in the oyster and heads to the centre of the oyster. It takes with it a piece of mantle that divides and conquers the larvae. This larvae usually comes from the excrement of stingrays (at least in Tahiti).
• Pearling as an industry is basically nonexistant in the present day. As a result, the collection of natural pearls worldwide is not growing, making those that exist extremely valuable (and unaffordable!). "Real" pearls that are purchased nowadays are almost all cultivated.
• Mikimoto, the Japanese man usually credited with discovering the process of pearl cultivation, was not the first to cultivate pearls, but was the first to patent and commercialize it.
• The Chinese use a different process than bead pearl cultivation (the "Japanese way"), and can cultivate up to 50 pearls from a single oyster.

Not only was the talk informative, but the speaker was entertaining. He said the "guts" of the "animal" move the pearl around by "belly dancing," and that the Chinese take pieces of mantle and roll it like we do with "nose stuff" (i.e. snot) before inserting it into the oyster. He was both knowledgeable and endearing.

I have a new appreciation for the pearl now, and although I'm not about to go out and buy a string of them, I will definitely look at them differently from now on. And I'm very glad we joined the group!

Bending for charity

So apparently I'm an old woman. I woke up this morning and just about every muscle in my body was aching. That's a bit of an exaggeration, but my back and arms are "feelin' it". Feeling what? I wish I could say it was the result of an intense spinning class yesterday or something, but in fact I'm all tuckered out from an evening of sorting. Yup, sorting.

This morning there was a rummage sale at one of the compounds where college employees live. It was not a college event; it just happened to be held there. The event was advertised on the Internet, in schools, and in the newspaper so people from all walks of life were expected.

The purpose of the sale was threefold:

1. It allows people to get rid of their stuff. Because people are always coming and going in this country, there is a lot of stuff discarded when contracts end and people who have built lives here over 3 years repatriate.
   
2. It gives people who need household items, clothing, reading material, etc. to get it at reduced prices. This is especially good for the expatriate community who have jobs here that do not pay as well as mine.
3. Money is collected for charity. All the proceeds of the sale go to a local group that helps people in need.

So you'd think this is the kind of thing I'd like to support. Surprisingly, we didn't go to the rummage sale. It was on the other end of the city on a Friday morning - the absolute worst time of the week to get public transportation. Even if we could get a taxi to bring us there, we'd be kind of stranded. Describing to a driver where to come to pick us up to return us to our home would be close to impossible since we don't really know where this compound is in relation to other things in Doha.

Instead, we helped set up last night. Darren and I took a different bus from the school - causing each of the "regulars" who got on after us to question whether they were on the right bus, since they didn't recognize us.

Besides the organizer - and the carload of stuff she had brought from her villa - we were the first to arrive at the clubhouse where everything was taking place. Darren and I got started sorting right away - I separated the clothes by gender and he divided the rest of the stuff into its respective categories (household items, books & DVDs, children's items, shoes...) around the room. Slowly, others came and were introduced to Darren to be put to work - he's a natural leader, folks. I eventually migrated to the shoe/luggage section when the tables arrived. When that was done, I'd pick up a random bag and deliver its contents to wherever it looked like they belonged. Besides the odd water break, this is how we spent the next 4 1/2 hours.

I really wish we had taken pictures of the progress of the evening. As soon as we would clear out a section of the room, it would get filled up again with boxes and bags of stuff. Eventually we had to request a second room just to hold all the books and DVDs. And it was finally decided to keep all the clothes in three large piles on the floor (men's, women's, and children's) for people to sort through - since despite our best efforts to organize them by size, and type, that's how they'd end up after a half an hour anyway.

There was a wide variety of people helping. There were a few Canadians, a number of Brits, at least one Irish woman and people from all over Asia and the Middle East. Darren spent some time talking to the guy who delivered the tables and who was from Lebanon. There was a lady from India who was helping with the sorting, and a couple from Nepal who were also helping and selling plants. We ended up getting two small pepper plants for our apartment while supporting people who send the proceeds back to Nepal!

When we got home around 9, we were exhausted. We hadn't eaten (besides some "timbits" a kind couple had brought with them) since lunch and I sure wasn't about to cook! Darren picked up a pizza, we ate it and promptly went to bed.

It was tiring, but many good things came out of the evening. We met some really nice people, we got some physical exercise (does bending count as exercize?) and I picked up a workout shirt! Most importantly, we were able to assist in a really great event that will hopefully help many people living in Qatar.

Ritzin' it up

Quite often over the first 2 years of our marriage, Darren and I would sit down together and discuss what we imagined our future would entail. The discussion inevitably came back to: we're not sure but we know it won't be this (this being whatever we were doing at the time - even if this was good). Never, ever did I imagine my future would include High Tea at the Ritz-Carlton, Doha...but it did!

As has been the tradition for the 7 years in which the college has been operating in Qatar, the new female employees and wives of new male employees were invited to the Ritz for High Tea. It's the college's way of welcoming us, giving us information about the wheres and hows of life in Doha, as well as a way for us to get to know each other a little. Usually this takes place within the first few weeks of being here. However, this year was a little different - with Ramadan falling in September - so the annual Newcomers' High Tea was just a nice social afternoon for the ladies.

It was a lovely afternoon. I enjoyed a pot of Saffron Chai and a three-tiered silver tray of sandwiches, scones and sweets. And of course nice conversation with the ladies at my table.

After the tea, we were divided into groups of 15 and taken on a tour of the hotel. We saw the indoor swimming pool, the outdoor pools, the indoor tennis courts, spa area, a "low end" hotel room, a "low end" suite and the guest clubhouse where for a few extra hundred riyals (between 60 and 100 dollars), guests can enjoy free drinks and snacks 5 times a day.

Throughout the tour I couldn't help but think back to our recent trip to Versailles. The chateau of Versailles demonstrated the incredible decadence of a small group of people (the Royal family) in the midst of an impoverished people (at least for some of the Louis' rules). My tour today showed that not much has changed. To me, the Ritz highlights the decadence afforded some (locals and expatriates from particular countries) who are serviced by people who often live in semi-squalor. However, the major difference is that the tax dollars of the many aren't being used to fund the decadence of the few.

Of course, this exact situation happens all around the world. Consider any developing country's tourism sector and you'll come across rich vacationers in fancy resorts located a stone's throw away from poor neighbourhoods.

I'm not saying it's necessarily wrong for these places to exist - tourism provides employment as well as a solid economic basis in many countries. I'm just saying that not much has changed. And I never thought I'd be experiencing (if only briefly) the decadent life.

Back to work adjustments

I have finished my first week back from the Eid vacation and I'm sure glad it's over. Ever since Ramadan ended, I have home from work each day feeling really tired, and yet I'm no busier than I was at any of my previous teaching jobs.

In an attempt to identify the cause of this fatigue, I came up with the following possible culprits:

• Trying to maintain a decent body temperature in over-air conditioned buildings. Although much better than working in stifling heat, it is draining to feel cold all day long. I have a nice pashmina scarf that I wrap around myself in the office and I usually drink 2 cups of tea a day, which definitely helps. And when I get really cold, I'll find an errand to run on the other side of campus. The walk in the heat always does the trick!

• Receiving additional responsibility at work. Now that the dust has settled (so to speak) on the semester, the time I was originally allotted for teaching a second - canceled - section of my 9 hour-a-week course has been reallocated. I've got additional projects to be working on now. Also, the course I'm teaching continues to become more and more content-specific, meaning we use more vocabulary specific to the students' future jobs in the oil industry. This is good for the students, but it means I have to do a little more research into basic concepts of the technical fields. It's interesting, but does require time.

• Driving home as the sun is setting. When we first arrived in Doha, the sun set around 6:30. Now it's closer to 5:30 when it gets dark. When I first started working at the college, I went home at 3:50. Now it's usually 4:50. There's something psychologically taxing about working longer than the sun does. I remember some winter days at Niagara College where I would enter the school before the sun came up and leave after it had set. It was depressing. Here I definitely beat the sun in terms of quitting time, but watching it prepare to check out on the commute home adds to my lethargy.

• Starting the day at 5:30am. This is the biggie. Three days a week I have to be at the college at 7:30am. In order to do that, I catch the 6:20 bus which arrives at our destination anywhere between 6:45 and 7:25, depending on traffic. So I start thinking about getting up as the alarm rings at 5:30, and finally make it to the shower by 5:45, prompted by Darren's, "If you don't go now, you'll miss the bus." Fortunately for me, he saves me at least 5 minutes in the getting ready process by getting up and making my lunch. (I wouldn't be surprised if he goes back to bed for a little nap after I leave - I WOULD!) Most days, once I'm at work I'm awake and ready for the day, but starting so early takes its toll...

I know I'm not the only one who is feeling the change. My students come to class saying they are so tired because they've had a long day. In all fairness, when you're taking 30 hours of classes a week, you do have long days. But when we were on the Ramadan schedule (shorter classes; shorter days), they said they were so tired because they hadn't slept the night before because of Ramadan. I guess it's hard to win no matter what the circumstances.

I'm just hoping I can train my body either require a little less sleep or get invigorated by AC, side projects, sunsets and early mornings!

Parisian Hightlights

Darren has just completed a marathon blogging event, in which he described each day of our trip to Paris from start to finish. The time invested in these posts rivals that spent back when we were first married and he was obsessed with time travel. Not that I'm complaining - I'm glad some of the funny stories and experiences we had have been documented by my witty husband.

I should say, however, that I was tempted to write a post entitled "I am not a jerk" in response to the way Darren portrayed me in some of the Paris posts. In it I would have listed all the factors that led to me asking if we could hurry up and "get through" Notre Dame, etc. But I won't. Those of you who know me know that I'm not a jerk - usually.

But since our 6 days in the City of Lights have already been preserved for posterity, I feel no need to recap our daily goings on while in Paris. Instead, I would like to reflect on the highlights of our trip from my perspective.

1. AUTUMN
It was so nice to get a taste of autumn while in Europe. The weather was crisp - staying in the teens throughout the week - and clear most days. The leaves had started to change to yellow and orange, and a few had even fallen. It was nothing like a trip to Northern Ontario in October, or even the Niagara Escarpment aflame at American Thanksgiving. But remember, I live in Qatar - what few trees I can see will never turn red. So I gaily skipped along through each miniature pile of leaves I found along the side of the street, and breathed in deeply every time I got a whiff of "autumn".

Of course, the weather in Doha will cool down and become fall-like, in a way, but it will continue to smell like dust, not rotting leaves. Neither sounds particularly appetizing, but I do love the smell of rotting leaves...and I got to experience it for a week!

2. LANGUAGE
Although I had been living outside of Canada for a month and a half when we arrived in Paris, this trip was my first opportunity to speak a language other than English. As I'm sure I've mentioned before, the language I use to communicate with the people I interact with at work, in restaurants, in taxis, in stores - everywhere! - is English. Sometimes it's a form of broken English, but it's English nonetheless. Despite his best efforts, Darren has only been able to use his Arabic words once since arriving!

As a language person, I found it invigorating to be able to communicate my needs/desires in another language (at least semi-effectively). Much of the French I studied in high school came right back, and I thoroughly enjoyed using it. Even Darren got over his resistant attitude toward French. I'll never forget one morning when he returned from a checking-our-email-errand and announced, "I did everything in French!!", referring to asking about the existence, location and cost of Internet service nearby out hotel.

Darren and I have talked repeatedly about signing up for an Arabic class here in Doha. There are quite a few to choose from, with varying degrees of commitment and cost. While I would love to be able to read and speak Arabic, I find I lack the motivation to learn it since there are few places to practice here. I'll just have to go to places that speak French to get my dose of linguistic variation, I guess.

3. HISTORY
I don't know much about history. I became interested in the past after my formal education had finished, so I have little knowledge of historical dates and figures. I'm sure Qatar has a rich and interesting history, which I intend to read up about one of these days, but at the moment all I know is that they used to dive for pearls and now they dig for oil.

I don't know much about the French Revolution, either. Or I should say I didn't. We went on a couple of walking tours in which the tour guide led us to buildings of note in the city and explained how they fit into either WWII or the Revolution (according to the tour we were on). It was so interesting to experience history so many years later; this is the way to learn history!

4. PDAs (Public Displays of Affection)
One of the things we frequently read in our research on living in the Middle East is that women and men are not permitted to touch in public. Men will often be seen walking hand in hand, or embracing or even kissing (it's very common for men to greet each other with either a couple cheek kisses or nose rubs), but the only man-woman touching we've seen has been from expatriates from Southeast Asia - and even that was rare.

So imagine the culture shock we faced when walking down the Seine and seeing young couples displaying their love everywhere! I found it kind of endearing, but surprising at the same time. The first few times I saw a couple kissing I wanted to run over and ask them if they realized what they were doing. But of course they did, and of course it didn't take long for Darren and me to forget about our acquired Middle Eastern demeanor and start holding hands and kissing in public too.

Don't worry; that's all stopped now!

5. EXERCISE
Darren and I lead a rather sedentary life in Doha. Because we don't have a car, and because we live so close to some good restaurants, a grocery store and a home centre, we do go for 15-minute walks a few times a week. But because of the weather, that's about all the outdoor exercise I do.

There are 2 gyms on campus - one male, one female - but I don't frequent either. I have a slight medical condition which doesn't allow me to sweat; instead, I just get hotter and hotter until I pass out. Needless to say, this makes me a little nervous about strenuous exercise. I do plan to start swimming lengths a couple of times a week once I buy a "length-swimming bathing suit", but for now I can usually be found sitting at my desk at work or lounging on the big brown chair at home with a book.

But in Paris, we walked and walked and walked some more. And on Wednesday we went on an all-day bike tour of Versailles. It was fantastic! The cool temperatures and the fascinating sites kept us moving. We got back to the hotel each night exhausted and with aching feet and backs, but it was worth it. I thoroughly enjoyed all the non-vigorous physical activity we got on our trip.

6. FRIENDS
By far the best part of our trip for me was spending time with our dear friends Dan & Marie. Before we had just surrounded ourselves with an amazing group of friends. Although we are making friends here in Doha, it takes a while to get to the point of true friendship. That's what we were developing back in St. Catharines.

It was SO good to visit with D&M - we had lots of laughs, some delicious food and even a few meaningful talks. I was reminded of how precious true friends are. It also made me miss everyone at home a little bit more.


So there you have it: the highlights of my time in Paris. We've been back in Doha for less than a week and already we're trying to plan our next trip! Unfortunately we don't have any friends or family who are planning on Christmassing abroad, so I think it will just be Darren and me. But I happen to like Darren (quite a bit), so it's not a sacrifice for me.

Home sweet home

It's amazing how things can change in just a week. We came back to a much cooler Doha (the breeze actually feels nice, although the thermometer remains around 30 degrees Celsius). In addition, we noticed that a good amount of progress has been made in the (de)construction across the street. By that I mean that the hole they're digging is much deeper and wider now!

Probably the hardest thing for us to do was to start speaking English again. When we got on our Gulf Air flight in Paris, both Darren and I greeted the flight attendants with "Bonjour." Probably not a single Gulf Air employee on that plane spoke French, though, making it much more effective to ask for apple juice than "jus du pomme." In Bahrain where we transferred planes, I said "Merci" to the gentleman who tore my boarding pass (I'm not sure what his job title is - you know, the last person you have contact with before walking down the platform toward the plane), although he was probably from an Arabic-speaking family. It was just habit.

We had a fantastic time away, but it's good to be home. Yes, home. When we were in Paris and someone asked where we were from I would always answer Canada, while Darren would say Qatar. I think it was just habit on my part because Qatar *is* home. Leaving for a few days has made it feel moreso thus.

Highlights from our week away will follow, but for now it's good to be home.